Friday, September 3, 2010

Try Again

I totally stopped any sort of regimen to assist in my weight loss. Bad me.

The stares and nasty comments online never do any good. Just harm. How can a person use a photo of themselves doctored onto a map saying they're fat enough to be their own continent as motivation? People are cruel, and you'd naturally say 'it's the internet; ignore it' but it's still real life. It's a real person using that internet.

So back on the band wagon I go.

What was my motivation?

Feeling good about myself. I've made some incredible friends since I moved and they make me feel wonderful. They give me hope. They've overlooked my physical deformity, because, let's face it, obesity isn't becoming; it's a deformity all it's own.

On top of that, a man I've actually been talking to for a year has given me the confidence in myself that I didn't quite have. He recently moved an hour away from me, and we have intentions to meet. :)

No matter what comes of it, relationship or a continued friendship, he's an incredible person who has constantly told me since the day we 'met' that he found me beautiful, and my weight meant nothing to him.

If only more people were like that.

Being called a cow, saying you're so fat you could be your own continent, may work for some as a form of motivation enough to fix their weight.

That doesn't do it for me. It's the confidence and self esteem boost by those around me, and even those online, that motivate me to fix myself.

I don't ever expect to be thin. A lil chunk is sexy to me.

I joined Extra Pounds to keep track of my calories, measurements, progress, etc and with the assistance of this site and my being careful, I took in less than 800 calories yesterday and so far less than 500 calories today, and that's including the bag of popcorn I'm currently munching on.

Since I get 1 free large pizza every week from the apartment, I need to find out the calories so that I may plan my meals accordingly.

Since I typically get my pizzas on Saturdays, I'll be more strict with the rest of the days' intake to make more room for the pizza. (No I'm not eating the whole pizza to myself.)

I will falter, I'm sure, but I'm going to try damned hard to do better. I want to be healthy. I really do.

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